Kris Rowland

24, A Live Artist With interests in Film, Music, Philosophy, Alcohol, Gender Politics, Patrick Wolf and Carnal pleasure.

'There is no settling down without some settling for. There is no long-term relationship not just putting up with your partner's flaws, but accepting them and then pretending they aren't there. We like to call it in my house “paying the price of admission.” … You can't have a long-term relationship with someone unless you're willing to identify the prices of admission you're willing to pay – and the ones you're not. But the ones you're not – the list of things you're not willing to put up with – you really have to be able to count [them] on one hand…

People, when they’re young, have this idea… “There’s someone out there who’s perfect for me”… “The one.”

"The one" does not fucking exist. "The one" is a lie. But the beautiful part of the lie is that it’s a lie you can tell yourself. Any long-term relationship that’s successful is really a myth that two people create together … and myths are built of lies, and there’s usually some kernel of truth…

When you think about it, you meet somebody for the first time, and they’re not presenting their warts-and-all self to you – they’re presenting their idealized self to you, they’re leading with their best. And then, eventually, you’re farting in front of each other. Eventually, you get to see the person who is behind that facade of their best, and they get to see the person your facade, your lie-self – this lie that you presented to them about who you really are. And what’s beautiful about a long-term relationship, and what can be transformative about it, is that I pretend every day that my boyfriend is the lie that I met when I first met him. And he does that same favor to me – he pretends that I’m that better person than I actually am. Even though he knows I’m not. Even though I know he’s not. And we then are obligated to live up to the lies we told each other about who we are – we are then forced to be better people than we actually are, because it’s expected of us by each other.

And you can, in a long-term relationship, really make your lie-self come true – if you’re smart, and you demand it of them, and you’re willing to give it to them… That’s the only way you become “the one” – it’s because somebody is willing to pretend you are. “The one” that they were waiting for, “the one” they wanted, their”one.” Because you’re not – nobody is. No two people are perfect for each other, ever, period – No two people are 100% sexually compatible, no two people are 100% emotionally compatible, no two people want the same things. And if you can’t reconcile yourself to that, you will have no relationships that last longer than two months.

Dan Savage The Price Of Admission

'The problem isn’t coming up with ideas, it is how to contain the invasion. My ideas are like uninvited guests. They don’t knock on the door; they climb in through the windows like burglars who show up in the middle of the night and make a racket in the kitchen as they raid the fridge. I don’t sit and ponder which one I should deal with first. The one to be wrestled to the floor before all others is the one coming at me with the most vehemence. I have, over the years, developed methods to deal with the invaders as quickly and efficiently as possible, though the burglars never stop coming. You invite a handful of friends for dinner, but the door bursts open and a hundred people are pushing in. You might manage to get rid of them, but from around the corner another fifty appear almost immediately… Finishing a film is like having a great weight lifted from my shoulders. It’s relief, not necessarily happiness. But you relish dealing with these “burglars.” I am glad to be rid of them after making a film or writing a book. The ideas are uninvited guests, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t welcome.'

Werner Herzog, A guide for the perplexed : Conversations with Paul  Cronin

A review here

Another Bollywood Tune :)

I think this has to be my favorite song from Bangladesh though. So many funny moments had during this song :)

"Lungi Dance" The Thalaiva Tribute Official Full Song | Honey Singh, Sha…


My Bangladesh song - Congratulations Alvi + Tasnia and thank you so much for your hospitality and general awesomeness.

Queen: London Thumakda Full Video Song | Kangana Ranaut, Raj Kumar Rao




Jog CRASH #sweat  #jog #jogface #sweatybetty #MIND #SPONSORME #birminghammarathon

Jog CRASH #sweat #jog #jogface #sweatybetty #MIND #SPONSORME #birminghammarathon

Sleepy after my first 
 4 mile jog/run #jogface #sport #MIND #sponsorme #greatbirminghamrun

Sleepy after my first
4 mile jog/run #jogface #sport #MIND #sponsorme #greatbirminghamrun

1st 3 mile run/walk  lost in Tooting Bec face. #run #sweat #tears #birminghammarathon #MIND

1st 3 mile run/walk lost in Tooting Bec face. #run #sweat #tears #birminghammarathon #MIND

We were so desperate for happiness, we forgot we weren’t free.Persepolis

We were so desperate for happiness, we forgot we weren’t free.

A pretty good summing up of what is happening the NHS atm. 

'I haven't got a speech. I didn't plan words. I didn't even try to. I just knew I had to get here. To stand here. And I knew I wanted you to listen. to really listen, not just pull a face like you're listening like you do the rest of the time. A face like you're feeling instead of processing. You pull a face and poke it towards the stage and we la-di-dah, we sing and dance and tumble around and all you see up here is not people, you don't see people up here, it's all fodder. And the faker the fodder is the more you love it. Because fake fodder is the only thing that works anymore. Fake fodder is all that we can stomach. Actually not quite all. Real pain, real viciousness, that we can take. Stick a fat man up a pole and we'll laugh ourselves feral because we've earned the right. We're so out of our minds with desperation we don't know any better. All we know is fake fodder and buying shit! That’s how we speak to each other, that’s how we express ourselves is buying SHIT! You know what, I have a dream? The peak of our dreams is a new app for our dopple, an app doesn’t exist! It’s not even there! We buy shit that aint even there, you want something real and free and beautiful, you couldn’t… it’d break us. We’re too numb for it, we might as well choke. It’s a wonder we can bare it, it’s any wonder you can dole it out in meagre portions and only then when its augmented and packaged and pumped through ten thousand pre-assigned filters, till there’s nothing more than a meaningless series of lies while we ride day in, day out, going where! Powering what!?! All tiny cells and tiny screens and bigger cells and bigger screens and FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!

— Black Mirror:15 Million Merits, Channel 4, Charlie Brooker

Some books seem like a key to unfamiliar rooms in one’s own castle.

—Franz Kafka, Letters to Friends, Family and Editors 

Why are you doing this, Derek? I asked myself as I walked home. You shouldn’t be out standing under these cold stars. You shouldn’t have the stamina to do this. The answer was that I didn’t have the stamina but throwing my arms around him was an act of defiance that kept me alive. Some shy from this sort of contact, from giving affection to a stranger.

—Why are you doing this - At Your Own Risk: A Saint’s Testament by Derek Jarman